I’ve got Rhythm
January 25th, 2005
If you’ve ever found yourself bored with the bulletproof accuracy and scientific rigor of horoscopes, I suggest you give biorhythms a shot.
Biorhythms. I haven’t thought about these things once since learning to plot and compare them at some point in middle school. They’re one of those peculiar things buried deep enough in the grey matter to avoid recall, but always at the ready to be recognized when least expected. Like yesterday, when searching for Konfabulator widgets and finding one designed to track the emotional, physical, and mental cycles that were started on the day of my birth.
Interest piqued, some reading and Googling refreshed my memory. A biorhythm is based on the idea that your body undergoes a natural, predictable cycle that can foretell the highs and lows among 3 different axis. The complication is that each factor is a sine wave running at it’s own speed. 23 days for the physical, 28 for the emotional and 33 for the intellectual. The times when your cycles are all high, you’re firing on all cylinders and life is good. When low, the doldrums are at hand. In between you get all sorts of complicated variations based on the addition of sine waves that only repeat as a group every 58 years or so.
The site I went to for my free biorhythm reading also offers the option to check your biorhythmic compatibility with a number of celebrities as well as with non-celebrities, if you happen to know their birthday. While I’m sure that Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Garner will be sad to know that I think our 94% matches are pure bunk, the idea behind this feature got me thinking about the idea of compatibility and what that really means. At this site, they compare how often the 2 biorhythms line up in each of the 3 categories. Since the overall length of each person’s cycle is the same, there is no variation over time when comparing one factor. For example, if your physical lines are completely out of alignment, they will match only the very small percentage of time when passing each other on the way from top to bottom and never come into alignment. This would be considered a bad match. The idea here is that the more often your rhythms are aligned, the more often you will be experiencing highs and lows of yourself and the relationship at the same time and will thus be more compatible.
At first blush this seems to make perfect sense. It would seem to be bad news if every time one person was feeling frisky the other had a headache or something like that. However, further examination of the composite curves leads me to another conclusion.
When the 2 cycles are most matched, this leads to wild combined swings in the composite curve. The highs are really high and the lows are really low. That may make for some excitement but what does it mean at the low points? If both people are feeling angry or distant, what keeps it all together? Where is the steady, guiding hand?
When the cycles are offset, the combined waves dampen each other and minimize the wild swings from high to low. When one person is perhaps least able to find emotional fortitude, the other has an excess in that area to draw from and cross that distance. Sort of the metaphysical equivalent of the cheesy Jesus "Footprints" poem. In this scenario, only one person is going crazy at a time and there is always someone manning the wheel. Each person takes turns keeping it all together.
I don’t know. While I have about as much faith in biorhythms predicting a successful relationship as numerology, it does make one examine which sorts of things should be valued in a partner.
Then again, maybe I’m just rationalizing.
“[M]aybe I’m just rationalizing.”
Perhaps because our waves yield a lousy 41% compatibility?
Of course. That’s exactly what you’ll see if you click on the link for those very words.
Did you know they make Jesus footprint sandals? Well, they do. I’m 0% compatible with them. And on that note on to more frog kissing.
Don’t worry, kids. I just did a detailed mathematical analysis of your blogorhythms, and you come up *at least* 79.16% compatible.
Phew!
i spent too much time (okay, 15 minutes) on the numerology site.
me and him:
Nine + Nine: Happiest when sharing a lofty plan. Very much a deep bond. Make it last!
does it work if when sharing a loft space?
“If you’ve ever found yourself bored with the bulletproof accuracy and scientific rigor of horoscopes, I suggest you give biorhythms a shot.”
I think this is the best sentence I’ve read all week.
“I think this is the best sentence I’ve read all week.”
And this is the best comment!
Hi Aaron,
Followed your link through Abby. I did this for July 4th, 2005. I need to be near Jude Law that day big time as our compatibility was 91% for that day-wow! http://www.facade.com/biorhythm/relationship/?Name=Dianne&Month=11&Day=19&Year=1959&tMonth=7&tDay=4&tYear=2005&range=14&Celeb2=Jude_Law
Better than my husband on almost 21 yrs. We were about overall 53%.
This was interesting. Thanks for pointing it out.
And the strange thing is, Jude was the first celeb I clicked out. It must be a magnetic draw!
Just one more observation…why did you pick Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Gardner in the first place? That’s an interesting point too.
Sorry for the typos in my post. I hate when I reread them and see the small mistakes.
2 things:
1- Your overall compatibility doesn’t change. You will always be 91% with Jude Law. The graph it shows you will reflect the date you selected but the number in the compatibility is fixed.
2- I went through and selected every celebrity, male and female, and Jennifer Garner and Cameron Diaz were my highest female matches. There was no luck involved there. Pure, hard, science.
Yes, I did tomorrow’s date and saw the compatibility factor with Mr. Law didn’t change. This is interesting and I enjoyed learning more about BRs today. Thanks A.
Hell yeah!
f*ck the biorhythms dude - bring your girlfriend to Paris!
I like the way you think, CTR.
LOL
2 against 1 — you’re toast my friend — just say the word and i’ll make reservations! 
YEAH! Do it! Do it! If Aaron gets this big job, I think a trip to Paris is DEFINITELY in order.
Okay. Here’s how I match up with my husband of almost 39 years:
Physical 53%
Emotional 93%
Intellectual 28%
Overall 58%
I did my research too. Ariel Sharon and I are 85% compatible and Clint Eastwood 88%. But I was giddy when I discovered Paul Newman and I are in sync at 97% until he was bested by Ricky Martin at 98%. I don’t think he’s my cup of tea.
You don’t think? I don’t know, I can sorta’ see you livin’ la vida loca.
I am. I am. Just not with Ricky Martin.
lalala lalalala lalalala
dum dee dum dum
Evil time-wasting site. It turns out that I will have amazingly high everything on June 12- the day after I move home. Does it know something I don’t about Maryland?
On a funnier note, my boy and I are 99% compatible physically, but only 41% emotionally. It explains so much.
If only I believed in this stuff. Cheers!
77% I’m just saying.